[oom] April Fool's Day

[hell_in_highheels]

Oh, River is not a morning person, but this prank requires some dedication and preparation.  She has her sonic screwdriver set to wake her an hour before the alarm, and she'd packed the blanket and the picnic basket the afternoon before while he was out running.

The matter of the prank itself is a simple few moments with the screwdriver on the red setting.  Quick.  Harmless.  And best of all, reversible. 

She still expects to get a bit of a hiding for it, but he did throw down the gauntlet.  Her cheeks ache from grinning at the very thought of the look on his face when he figures out just what she'd done.

Prank accomplished, she slips into her boots and shushes Damocles, swearing him to silence.  Rather, bribing him with future promises of bacon.  She leaves the note on the pillow and catches herself just before she kisses him on the cheek.  If he wakes, the surprise will be ruined before she can make her escape. 

Dear Richard~

Have been kidnapped by rabbits.  They said something about their pelts being used for "unseemly" purposes. Their leader says, if you ever want to see me again, come alone.

(crudely drawn map of the lake side and the meadow with an X)

Love,
~River

Comments

[captainryan.livejournal.com]

The alarm goes off and Richard rolls to smack it silent before it wakes River. Only River is gone with just a piece of paper on her side of the bed. The werewolf arches an intrigued eyebrow at it before throwing the covers off and getting out of bed.

He gets a shirt and trousers on before he notices the holster. And his gun. What the- what did she do to them? Why are they pink? This awful, bright, cornea-searing purplish pink?

He finishes dressing, dumbfounded, and takes the weapon and its holder to the saferoom. Only to find that every single piece of kit is in the same condition. What was she thinking? He slides the clip out to take a closer look at the damage. There's no way he can fire this when it's covered in...huh. Everything is that awful fuchsia colour, but it doesn't seem to be paint. In fact, it looks like the colour is in the metal itself.

Which means his weapons are in perfect working order.

Did she say anything to you? He asks Dam.

I've been sworn to silence with bacon, the dog answers seriously, wagging his tail.

Ryan gives a disgruntled snort as he straps the P226 on and shuts the saferoom. What on earth brought this on? The note implies she isn't mad at him, he can't recall any anger in her scent last night (far from it), but why else would she turn his kit pink?

Oh, look, she got his boots, too. Charming. Okay, the torn knickers stuffed in one get a twitch at the corner of his mouth.

He gets his answer as soon as he hits the bar proper. The costume change is unexpected and very much unwanted, particularly the leather trousers. April 1st. Ryan quickly escapes out the back door with Damocles, glad to return to his usual clothes. Yes, even the pink boots.

He frowns as he starts reading the map. This is not amusing.

[hell_in_highheels]

There is a thread of her scent on the breeze. Playful River, chase me follow me hunt me.

If he follows the map along the lakeshore, a good distance from the Bar, it will lead him up a fairly well-marked path up to one of the more beautiful spring meadows. Her scent is stronger here. But there is no sign of her.

Hold on a moment. Is that a bit of coy laughter from the far end of the meadow?

Followed possibly an angry squeak?

[captainryan.livejournal.com]

He smells her and he hears her, but he doesn't see her and he swears to God if this is because the stone angel has come back he's going to be very angry.

"River?" Do you see her anywhere?

Uhuh, but her scent goes this way. Dam's been trained in tracking by Ryan himself. The dog knows what he's doing and he charges ahead.

Only to disappear in front of Ryan's eyes.

Ryan stares, shocked and enraged. DAM! He roars, bounding after him.

Not again, dammit. Not again.

[hell_in_highheels]

She hears his voice and cringes at the fear. And then she hears the roar as Dam crosses through the cloak.

"Richard?" She calls to him, careful to keep her voice light, even as the number of strangely hued rabbits continues to grow. "We're all right, it's just a privacy screen."

One of the plaid hares steps forward almost nonchalantly, grabbing the corner of the picnic basket and ripping a chunk out of the wicker. "Oh you little shit, leave it! I was kidding about the -- damn it!"

[captainryan.livejournal.com]

Ryan hits the screen and passes through. His face goes through several interesting emotions: shock, both at seeing Dam and her still here as well as seeing both Dam and her naked. The former shock turns to relief and joy, while the latter turns to embarrassment at seeing her unexpectedly.

And then because the adrenaline from thinking they were lost is still pumping through him and she's being attacked by rabbits, he snarls and pounces on one of the lapines.

Damocles is already chewing on the one that attacked the basket.

[hell_in_highheels]

Oh this was so not the scene she envisioned when she left the flat this morning.

She watches him move like quicksilver, liquid and powerful, and all the things she had planned for this morning just evaporate. There is a sickening crunch and she doesn't have a chance to watch any more when she sees a brace of tartans trying to take a chunk out of her calf muscle. One goes flying with sharp kick.

She picks up the unopened wine bottle and swings it at the remaining rabbit, hard enough to send the bastard flying. "Just once," she growls. "Just once I'd like a picnic to come off without --" Another swing and another rabbit goes hurtling through the air, arse over teakettle, "having to fight my way out!"

[captainryan.livejournal.com]

Ryan is not really the sort of person who quips when he is fighting. However, six months in the animated Ghostbusters continuum have loosened him up some, not to mention the fact that he's immensely relieved to see River.

So he manages to growl, amongst his constant growl, "What do you expect when you practically offer yourself up?"

He's a little grumpy. Where 'little' means 'a lot'. As another poor rabbit is finding out.

[hell_in_highheels]

She's never seen him this mad.

It's the complete opposite end of the spectrum from what she was aiming for. Later? She might have a good cry about this, she thinks.

But right now, the rabbits aren't give her much choice but to keep swinging. She catches up her skirts and her blouse, slipping into her boots the first chance she gets. Breakfast, in the form of the contents of the picnic basket, is strewn about their little corner of the meadow.

Damocles has taken the fight to them, and they are beginning to scarper. She takes advantage of the lull to slip into her clothes.

She doesn't want to take the hiding she knows is coming while in her birthday suit.

[captainryan.livejournal.com]

It's kinda been a long morning.

And he only got up about 15 minutes ago.

Ryan glowers after the herd of rabbits as Damocles continues to chase them off, head low and still growling. Then he takes a deep breath and literally shakes himself before turning to face River.

Despite his clenched teeth and the overall look of disapproval on his face, his eyes are relieved and anxious.

He thought he lost her there for a moment.

[hell_in_highheels]

Unfortunately, she can't smell the relief, she can only see the anger.

She covers her face with one hand, arms crossed over her body, defensive. "I'm sorry, love. I'm so.. so sorry. This is not at all what I had planned."

She's trying not to look at the pink combat boots. She doesn't want to anger him anymore.

She screws her eyes tight shut, grimacing against the slightly hysterical giggle bubbling up in her throat.

[captainryan.livejournal.com]

Richard manages a faint forced smile. He doesn't really care about his boots at the moment.

"I thought you were gone," he says quietly, walking towards her, needing to touch her and reassure himself.

[hell_in_highheels]

The sound of his voice washes over her and the laugh dies in her throat. She shakes her head, no, not that. Never that.

She knows what it's like to lose the one you love, and she never, ever wants him to have to live through that.

She opens her eyes, her body already in motion. There are only a few steps between them but it's enough for her to build up enough momentum to crash into him.

Her arms encircle his neck and she kisses him fiercely.

[captainryan.livejournal.com]

Richard needs that badly just now. He catches her and pulls her up tightly, firmly kissing back, proving to himself through all his sense that she's still here.

He lets out a shaky breath as they break off, resting his head on her shoulder and giving a rough bark for Damocles to come back. He thought he lost the pup, too, after all.

[hell_in_highheels]

She holds him with all her strength, pressing her face into his neck, explaining quietly. Okay, babbling, really.

"It's a privacy screen, just a little thing, like a force field, only it bends the light around it when you look at it from one direction, and I thought if you could smell me it wouldn't be such an issue, and I really just wanted to surprise you with a breakfast picnic, but those bloody rabbits started coming out of the woods, and I thought they were cute at first but they were all red-eyed and angry..."

He's going to have to shush her if he wants to get a word in edgewise.

[captainryan.livejournal.com]

Nono, Suzi's taught him quite well that you let the babbler go until they run out of breath, decipher what they said, and then say your piece. Really, it's second nature to him for pack members.

"It wasn't the rabbits," he murmurs when he gets the chance.

Damocles plops down on the blanket with the remains of one of the rabbits and starts eating.

[hell_in_highheels]

"Oh Richard, it's two seconds with the sonic screwdriver, I can have them back to normal in a heartbeat."

She's pushing away from him, fumbling in her pocket for the screwdriver. Her scent is worry verging on fear.

[captainryan.livejournal.com]

He doesn't let her go.

"It's not that either," he says dryly, letting his tone and eyebrow convey his displeasure with the pink.

"River, you know Milliways isn't always safe, correct?" She should. She's sleeping with a werewolf, after all.

[hell_in_highheels]

She quits fumbling in her pocket and wraps her arms back around his middle, resting her cheek against his. She takes a deep breath and lets it out in a shaky sigh, trying to compose herself. She can feel the fear in him now, what's left of it.

"I know." And even more gently, "And I can take care of myself. I shouldn't need an armed escort to pull off a simple picnic."

[captainryan.livejournal.com]

"It's not just the rabbits," he says a bit sharply. And he knows she can take care of herself. He wasn't even thinking of that, he was thinking of how to explain why he reacted the way he did.

"Nevermind. You're here and safe, that's all that matters."

[hell_in_highheels]

It takes her a moment, but she's beginning to see just how frightened he was. "Richard," my mate. "I'm sorry I scared you. I should have given you more information." She kisses the corner of his mouth, nuzzles against his chin. "I promise. It won't happen again."

She can't help but think, live and learn.

[captainryan.livejournal.com]

Gah, it's hard to stay irritated when she does that. It triggers all sorts of instincts, both wolf and human.

"It's not that either," he sighs, a bit exasperated. "It was...a fluke. Nevermind.

"I'm sorry the fun bit of your surprise was ruined."

[hell_in_highheels]

She rests against him for a long moment, breathing his breath, just feeling him in her arms, holding him close. Her scent wraps around him.

I love you so much it hurts to breathe.

She hardly knows him, she thinks, but that doesn't matter.

"Is there any place where there aren't rabbits out here?"

[captainryan.livejournal.com]

He's still fairly sober himself. This has brought back bad memories for him.

"There's a place in the woods. It's a good hour and a half walk, though."

[hell_in_highheels]

"I don't mind a walk," she murmurs, her smile returning. She pulls back to look into his face, one hand coming up to brush along his jaw. "I wore my boots and you can tell me, on the way, if you want."

[captainryan.livejournal.com]

Richard arches a considering eyebrow.

"I'll tell you if you turn my boots, weapon, and holster back to their proper colours."

They're still pink. In case anyone forgot. Because he hasn't.